Saturday, September 15, 2018

Race Recap

I decided to jump into one more race before surgery next week. I wanted to see if I could actually race instead of jog, so I picked a small 5K in Longmont that benefitted the Safe Shelter of St. Vrain Valley.

It's hard to go into a race knowing you're neither physically or mentally prepared nor structurally sound, but the truth is that I love racing. Yes, it terrifies me, and I have all these limitations and demons to address. Still, there's a deep sadness in my heart when I'm completely removed from my sport. It's not a great idea to wobble through a race, but there's always a risk, even when you go in fully prepared.

The one thing I've noticed is that I tend to have some breathing issues about two miles into things when I'm actually running harder. I don't know if this is a panic type thing, but I've found slowing slightly and regrouping seems to help. The problem is that it's easy to settle into a tempo pace from there instead of putting the hammer down, which is a little bit what I did today. I got sort of lost in thought out there after the halfway point. Before I knew it, we were at the finish, and I didn't have any time to try to catch the two ladies in front of me. They seemed within reach, but I lacked confidence. Both of them looked so smooth and strong. While I was glad to keep them in view, I really wish I could have trusted myself enough to make a move. Racing is so unfamiliar to me right now, though.

I've got some noticeable imbalances to deal with, but I'm incredibly grateful that I'm running at all. Every time I say that a part of me thinks, "Yeah, but I want to really run again!" Patience isn't my forte. I have to be patient, though. If I'm not careful, too many things could go wrong. Some days I get to explore the trails; other days I'm limited to a short stroll and some biking. I just never know how much I will be able to manage on a given day, so training on a set schedule isn't likely.

But I got through a race with minimal pain. After the 10K I jogged, I had to really back off everything for a while until I could walk again. Imbalances lead to tightness and strains, so I'm forced to honor what my body says. Sometimes it says stop. Today it allowed me to be a part of the running community, and that makes me happy. I know. Even us Eeyore types smile now and then.

My time isn't great, but I feel oddly optimistic about it. Now to get through this surgery and back out there as soon as possible without being reckless.

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It's not a spectacular performance, but there's room for improvement.


  1. Hope the recovery from surgery is going well. Hey, you won your age-group! I know you're not happy with the time, but to me on the other side of 23 minutes it seems amazing. And yes, racing is fun, it never gets old.

    1. Thank you, Ewen! I hope all is well with you these days.


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